LiFe

I've been trying to ignore having this disease, and I've been trying to stay as positive as i can. Last week I tried to do water aerobics with a dear friend.. My 27 year old mind says, " Ok Jami what's the big deal.. Your just doing aerobics with a bunch of old people, and your an active girl.. Lets do this!"... but... My body couldn't make it past 10 minutes(it was an hour long class). I tried with all my might to last longer.. it just didn't happen. The old people beat me! My body payed for it the next week, and i cried when i got home.

Everynight i lay in bed for at least 3 or 4 hours trying to fall asleep.. i wake up numerous times in the night in pain. My arms and legs are just so unbearable at night. i pray so hard that it will go away so i can sleep.. and usually i end up so tired i just get knocked out and sleep until 7:45 when mike has to go to work.

i decide today i'm going to go to Wallymart. My mind says " What's the big deal.. your just going to get a few things.." i was doing well in the beginning, I was stuffing Foster with suckers to make him happy. Until after the 1st few isles my knees became so unbearable i had to lean on the cart and walk like an old lady... what?? i'm not 80!!

I remind myself everyday that we all have our trials! That is what is going to make us stronger. That is why we are here.. To grow, and to become closer to the Lord. I'm not going to lie.. This has been the hardest trial i've had so far.. It is a weird feeling to have a healthy body before, and then slowly over 6 months your body is as if your an 80 year old women. I don't want to complain.. and i try not too. I think at times though it's ok to get out your frustrations. Sorry you have to hear my frustrations at times. I promise most the time i'm still happy Jami.. i just have my moments.. like tonight at 1:00 in the morning!

Again thanks for your support and prayers. It means so much to me.

ps: For those of you that don't know. I had another lyme disease test done, and it showed that I for sure have Chronic Lyme Disease. In the beginning I thought.. oh lyme disease isn't so bad.. but it's a pretty crazy disease that stays in your body forever. It's going to be a long process in getting me better, but I CAN DO IT!!! I can fight!

wHaT tHeY hAvE BeeN uP tO

BRIDGER

i love robin and batman

i call my brother "Joker Baby"

the moment i wake up i PLAY a scene of ROBIN or BATMAN

i love skiing and SLEDDING

i still love holding HANDS with my MOM to fall asleep

i call my MOM "Mrs. Blue Ranger" when she is my TEACHER

favorite songs: "Jingle bells, batman SMELLS"

and

"Follow the PROPHET"

i was so EXCITED to be a SUNBEAM

i'm a class CLOWN

i LOVE my grandmas

i have AWESOME friends

FAVORITE movie TEEN TITANS

FOSTER

i'm obessed with BALLOONS
i love YO GABBA with JACK BLACK

(honestly you all have to see that show... it's so funny!)

i love to cuddle my grandPAPA

i LOVE having my FINGERNAILS clipped, and cry when my mom stops
i love HAIR and i love to PULL it

i especially love PIGGY tails and bows on girls

i love ANIMALS

i'm mischevious and an adventurer
i TRY and go potty like my big bro

i LOVE time out

when i fall I use my HEAD to stop me

I'm bLeSSed...

i just love this pic, i don't know why, it just makes me smile.

i just love Foster at the bottom looking like the Christmas story boy.

i love Bridger's gigantic smile.

i love Mike's face, who is just so happy playing with his boys..

i'm so blessed..

this child has no fear

there were 13 year old kids who would'nt go down a huge hill with a jump.

Bridger jumped on his sled and took off down the huge hill and hit the jump with air.

he had the greatest time of his life.

the kids looked at him and said "Holy crap little guy, your crazy!"

yep, that's my boy!
(ps: this isn't the huge hill, i didn't get pictures)

fosty heading on his way, and loving it!






it's good for me to get out.
even though i struggle.
it's very worth seeing my kiddo's having a blast.



SMALL TOWN FUN

we visited Mike's bro and his family

we had a blast
i just love small towns
here is why:
there is something about the people that i just love
they are humble
everyone knows everyone
they are easy going
not materialistic
simple

carharts and wranglers are fashionable
they have fun outdoor activities

i loved when i lived in a small town

bowling with the kids
great entertainment
kids LOVED it!

crash

painting in the snow

bridger's masterpiece

A little update:

i am feeling about the same.. they are still not certain if this is all from lyme disease... so again i'm being tested for a million other things. it's a little frustrating, but also i know i'm so very blessed. i've realized how wonderful my family and friends are.. honestly i can't believe all the phone calls, emails, dinners, watching my kiddo's, cleaning my toliets and house(thanks liz!), and just all the prayers. i'm so grateful...i cry often, just thinking about all the wonderful people i have in my life..thank you!

wAtCh OuT jOkER

We're going to get ya!

(i love Robin's one eyed stare down:)

ImaGiNatIoN
I was resting in the other room and heard Bridger working on something, so I decided to check it out.. He strung tape across the whole room, so his superhero's could hang on something.

love these boys

Foster famous head stand he does all through out the day when he is bored..

(Star girl, Flower girl, and Robin)

Face painting is a favorite in our house. Bridge's cousins got in on it while they visited. Thanks to Miguel our artist!

CHRISTMAS O9

all i want for christmas is to be with my family

and

i got it!

Bridger loved wrapping Fosty and I up... honestly this entertained the boys for an hour!
Christmas Eve with the Ostrander Cousins
cousins break dancing together

hottie Erin(Mike's sister)

Uncle James and Foster

brothers enjoy hot cocoa

Foster loves his Aunt Charlie

Christmas morning. Bridger checking out all the goods.. He screamed when he saw them all.

Papa setting up the rollercoster.

foster could careless about the presents.. he just wanted chocolate!

the best present Santa could've brought.

Uncle Eric and Aunt Tag gave Bridge a new costume!

Horray for me.. I'm sure this will be the costume for the month that he will wear everyday..

To- My Boys

I know life has been different this last little while.

I'm sorry you've had to see your mom go through this trial.

It's been hard for me to not be able to do what I use too.

You've both been so patient and forgiving, it's true.

-

It's actually been good to not rush around for once.

It's been good to stay home with you two wild boys and get punched.

It's been fun using our imagination and pretending to fly to the zoo or moon.

I'm glad Bridger made me Bat-women and that I can fight the Joker while I lay down on my petoot.

You've shown me the little things in life are the greatest.

-

-

Bridger I know your worried about me quite often.

Your so caring and have such a kind soul.

Your encouragement and love has been helping me heal.

-

-

Foster i love your little mumbled language you speak,

but what's amazing is you say "Jesus" so very clear I can't believe!

That makes me smile and weep.

-

-

You've both taught me I need to be better at forgiveness.

You forgive in a instant when I say or do something i shouldn't.

All I have to do is say I'm sorry and give you a hug,

And your smile returns like the Son above.

-

Bridger your so smart, kind, sincere, and happy.

Foster your my cuddler, adventurer, food lover, and easy going cutie.

-

Our trials in our lives will make us so much stronger..

My 2 precious sons.. You are what is keeping me going!

I love you!

Mom

Verdict is in!!!

i just found out i have

Lymes Disease!

i know it's insane people!

Really who gets Lymes disease??

But

at least i now know what the crap is going on with my body.

It's going to take a while to be healed, and i may never be healed fully,

but at least we are on a step up to helping my body.

Thanks again for your support!

Love ya all!

Really if you ever have health issues and the doctors keep sending you to other doctors. Make sure you keep fighting for your health!

You are the one who knows your body.